Why We Stay: Understanding the Pull of the Familiar, Even When It Hurts [episode 71]
Listen to Why We Stay: Understanding the Pull of the Familiar, Even When It Hurts on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | your platform of choice
Recently, my friend and I were having a conversation about the topic of people staying in bad situations. She was expressing some frustration with seeing people who seem to like the situation they’re in and didn’t understand why they don’t do something to help themselves!
I definitely get this, and I bet you do, too. In today’s episode, we’re talking about why we stay and the pull of the familiar, even when it hurts.
As humans, we find comfort in familiarity. Our brains are wired for survival, and we LIKE what’s comfortable and safe, even when it’s actually the opposite of that.
It’s kind of like the old saying, “Better the devil you know than the devil you don’t.” Even though we’re not in an ideal situation, it feels safer to stay in the muck we’re familiar with compared to attempting to climb out and risk falling flat!
It’s important to remember that the environments we come from are what shape us and what we recognize as normal. If someone grew up in chaos and instability, putting themself in a safer and stable environment might feel really scary.
The pull of the familiar is SO strong, but it’s not unbreakable. With curiosity, bravery, and support, it’s totally possible to step out of what’s comfortable and into something better.
Change can be scary, friend, but this is also where growth happens (believe me – I know this ALL too well). If you need help in this area, I’m here for you, and I would be honored to walk alongside you on this journey!
In this episode, Why We Stay: Understanding the Pull of the Familiar, Even When It Hurts, I cover:
- Why we find comfort in familiarity
- Understanding what’s really going on when someone stays where they are
- My personal experience with staying comfortably numb for far too long
- Questions to ask yourself when you’re considering making a change
Resources & Links:
- Schedule a free consult and see if 1:1 Good Movement Guidance is right for you
- Join the waitlist for the Good Movement Collective
- Good Movement music by: Aaron Espe
- Podcast produced by: Jill Carr Podcasting
Connect with Terryn:
- Follow on Instagram @terryn.drieling
- Check out my website
- Send me an email at terryn@terryndrieling.com
Related Episodes:
- Episode 62: The Hard Truth About Emotions: You Gotta Feel Them All
- Episode 30: Let’s Normalize Asking Questions
- Episode 27: What is the Purpose of Emotions
- Episode 25: The ‘Thick Skin’ Myth and How We View Emotions in Rural America
More about the Good Movement Draws Good Movement podcast:
In stockmanship (the art and science of handling cattle in a safe, effective, low-stress manner), we have this phrase . . . good movement draws good movement.
It’s this thing that happens when we ask a small group of cattle, maybe a cow, or a pair to move out in a certain direction and their movement draws the whole herd into moving in the same direction.
Good movement happens when we approach the cattle with a positive attitude, read and really listen to what they’re telling us, and communicate accordingly.
We don’t approach the aware, flighty cattle the same as we do the tame, docile cattle. We adjust ourselves, our energy, and approach, and communicate with each differently.
These adjustments help us effectively draw good movement from each, which then draws good movement from the herd. But it starts with us.
The same is true for humans. Good movement starts with us.
Welcome to Good Movement Draws Good Movement, the podcast where farmers, ranchers, and rural folks can grow relationally through awareness, understanding, and effective communication.
Hey, it’s me – T. I’m your host, and I, along with my guests, will be covering topics related to drawing good movement – things like self and social awareness, brain science, positive psychology, extending grace, and so much more.
We’ll share tools that can help you understand why you are the way you are, why others are the way they are, and how you can use that to step out of self-told lies with grace and compassion to draw good movement in conversations, relationships, and life in rural America.
Tune in every Tuesday and make sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode! Let’s go draw good movement!
