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Hey, it's me - T!

Rancher | Relationship Guide | Podcaster

Whether you’re navigating the highs and lows of marriage, family dynamics, or friendships in rural America, my goal is to help you draw good movement in life and relationships. 

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grow relationally through awareness, understanding, and effective communication

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We’re so quick to say “nothing major happened. We’re so quick to say “nothing major happened.” But that doesn’t mean nothing happened.

Sometimes it’s a whole lotta little things that pile up. Sometimes it’s what we didn’t get — the safety, the love, the consistency we needed.

Those small things shape us.
And they deserve our attention.

(if you resonated with this post, check out ep. 104 of the Good Movement Draws Good Movement podcast – 🔗 in bio.)
I used to be a chronic smile slapper on-er – so- I used to be a chronic smile slapper on-er – so-much-so that my husband dubbed me an “incurable optimist.” It took quite a little work, but I can now say that I’ve been cured. 

Not that I don’t still err on the side of optimism, I do. It’s just that now, I don’t pretend to feel optimistic/happy outwardly when that’s not really what I’m feeling on the inside. 

When I started showing up without sucking it up and smiling, I actually felt better. 

Not at first. At first it felt awkward. 

But the more I practiced it with myself and those closest to me, the better it felt, the lighter I felt, and the more I started showing up that way with everyone.
I thought appearing calm was something to be proud I thought appearing calm was something to be proud of. 

But what I’ve learn is that what looked calm from the outside was really my nervous system in shutdown.

I wasn’t calm. I was numb.
I didn’t feel anger, sadness, or even much joy. I just didn’t feel.
And people praised me for it.

Now I know – real calm feels alive. It breathes. It connects. It moves with life – it doesn’t hide from it.
I spent most of my whole life silent about my stru I spent most of my whole life silent about my struggles. I found little ways to shove things down and numb the pain because “you have to be strong”.

I’m three years into healing, and now I know strength doesn’t come from silence – it comes from witness. 

If you’re struggling alone, I am here. I will sit with you and hold space for you – as you are and in whatever you’re going through.
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