What It Looks Like to Truly Apologize [episode 124]
Listen to What It Looks Like to Truly Apologize on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | your platform of choice
After episode 120, Why Is It So Hard to Admit Mistakes?, aired, I had several of you reach out. Those conversations naturally turned toward apologies, which really got my wheels turning.
I decided to ask both my Instagram and Threads communities a few questions, and while the sample size was small, the responses were still incredibly telling. Nearly 70% shared that, as children, the adults in their lives never recognized their feelings without trying to change them.
Even more heartbreaking? Many witnessed adults apologizing to others more often than to them.
In today’s episode, I’m talking about what it looks like to truly apologize. If the apology includes a “but,” it’s usually not repair. It’s more like deflection and self-protection. If admitting mistakes didn’t feel safe when we were young, of course, it’s going to feel hard now. Safety HAS to exist for honesty and accountability to grow!
I’m deeply encouraged by those of you who are choosing to do this differently with your own children. You’re offering real apologies and modeling repair, and that’s POWERFUL. I’m actively working on this too (even though it’s still very much a work in progress).
If this conversation resonates and you’d like to explore your own patterns around apologizing or admitting mistakes, I’d love to support you on your journey. You can schedule a free 30-minute 1:1 Good Movement Guidance call – don’t forget to mention “cast pod” for 10% off!
In this episode, What It Looks Like to Truly Apologize, I cover:
- What my SM community polls revealed about emotional recognition & apologies in childhood
- What a true apology is + why “I’m sorry, but…” isn’t real repair
- How apologies can be used to deflect blame and avoid admitting mistakes
- Why safety is essential for accountability and honest repair
- The importance of modeling genuine apologies for our kids
- Embracing progress over perfection as we heal and do it differently
Resources & Links:
- Schedule a free consult and see if 1:1 Good Movement Guidance is right for you
- Check out my merch shop
- Join the waitlist for the Good Movement Collective
- Good Movement music by: Aaron Espe
- Podcast produced by: Jill Carr Podcasting
Connect with Terryn:
- Follow on Instagram @terryn.drieling
- Check out my website
- Send me an email at terryn@terryndrieling.com
Related Episodes:
- Episode 83: Let Them (See You Feel): Raising Resilient Kids by Being Real in Front of Them
- Episode 84: Apologies Aren’t Weak – They’re Repair
- Episode 120: Why Is It So Hard to Admit Mistakes?
More about the Good Movement Draws Good Movement podcast:
In stockmanship (the art and science of handling cattle in a safe, effective, low-stress manner), we have this phrase . . . good movement draws good movement.
It’s this thing that happens when we ask a small group of cattle, maybe a cow, or a pair to move out in a certain direction, and their movement draws the whole herd into moving in the same direction.
Good movement happens when we approach the cattle with a positive attitude, read and really listen to what they’re telling us, and communicate accordingly.
We don’t approach the aware, flighty cattle the same as we do the tame, docile cattle. We adjust ourselves, our energy, and approach, and communicate with each differently.
These adjustments help us effectively draw good movement from each, which then draws good movement from the herd. But it starts with us.
The same is true for humans. Good movement starts with us.
Welcome to Good Movement Draws Good Movement, the podcast where farmers, ranchers, and rural folks can grow relationally through awareness, understanding, and effective communication.
Hey, it’s me – T. I’m your host, and I, along with my guests, will be covering topics related to drawing good movement – things like self and social awareness, brain science, positive psychology, extending grace, and so much more.
We’ll share tools that can help you understand why you are the way you are, why others are the way they are, and how you can use that to step out of self-told lies with grace and compassion to draw good movement in conversations, relationships, and life in rural America.
Tune in every Tuesday and make sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode! Let’s go draw good movement!
