Feeling Lonely in Your Marriage? Go From Roommate Mode to Reconnection [episode 155]
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Listen to Feeling Lonely in Your Marriage? Go From Roommate Mode to Reconnection on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | your platform of choice
There was a point early in our marriage when Tom and I weren’t really functioning as husband and wife anymore. We were adjusting to parenthood, working demanding feed yard and ranch jobs, and constantly triggering each other’s fight-or-flight responses.
Eventually, we stopped fighting altogether and simply checked out. We lived under the same roof, but emotionally, we were in full-on roommate mode.
In today’s episode, I’m talking about feeling lonely in your marriage + how to go from roommate mode to reconnection. I’d be lying if I told you Tom and I have marriage completely figured out now. We still disagree, still trigger each other, and still fight (sometimes).
The difference today? We’re coming to those moments with awareness, practices, and experience we didn’t have before. Good, clear communication doesn’t just happen. It requires self-awareness + a willingness to understand what’s happening within ourselves BEFORE we can communicate well with someone else!
Those hard seasons became balance points – moments when something had to move or change direction. They’re part of why I created Balance Point, a six-month group experience for rural women who feel lonely, emotionally depleted, or like they’re everyone’s last priority.
If you’re feeling lonely in your marriage and/or always asking what everyone else needs from you, I’d love to support you inside Balance Point. It begins October 20th, 2026, and offers a safe, confidential space to reconnect with yourself + build healthier relationships alongside women who truly understand rural life!
In this episode, Feeling Lonely in Your Marriage? Go From Roommate Mode to Reconnection, I cover:
- How Tom and I found ourselves living in “roommate mode”
- Why poor communication can trigger our fight-or-flight responses
- The inner work that changed how I showed up in our relationship
- Why we can’t force someone else to change or do their own work
- How good movement within ourselves can create movement in our relationships
- Recognizing the “balance points” where something has to change
- Creating connection and healthier relationships without sacrificing ourselves
Resources & Links:
- Learn more about Balance Point
- Schedule a free consult and see if 1:1 Good Movement Guidance is right for you – mention “castpod” when you book to receive 10% off!
- Check out my merch shop
- Join the waitlist for the Good Movement Collective
- Good Movement music by: Aaron Espe
- Podcast produced by: Jill Carr Podcasting
Connect with Terryn:
- Follow on Instagram @terryn.drieling
- Check out my website
- Send me an email at terryn@terryndrieling.com
Related Episodes:
- Episode 3: How Self-Awareness Has Helped Our Marriage
- Episode 24: How to Get Others to Do the Personal Growth Work with Tom
- Episode 70: How We’ve Navigated Expectations in Ranch Life and Marriage with Tom
More about the Good Movement Draws Good Movement podcast:
In stockmanship (the art and science of handling cattle in a safe, effective, low-stress manner), we have this phrase . . . good movement draws good movement.
It’s this thing that happens when we ask a small group of cattle, maybe a cow or a pair, to move out in a certain direction, and their movement draws the whole herd into moving in the same direction.
Good movement happens when we approach the cattle with a positive attitude, read and really listen to what they’re telling us, and communicate accordingly.
We don’t approach the aware, flighty cattle the same as we do the tame, docile cattle. We adjust ourselves, our energy, and our approach, and we communicate with each other differently.
These adjustments help us effectively draw good movement from each, which then draws good movement from the herd. But it starts with us.
The same is true for humans. Good movement starts with us.
Welcome to Good Movement Draws Good Movement, the podcast where farmers, ranchers, and rural folks can grow relationally through awareness, understanding, and effective communication.
Hey, it’s me – T. I’m your host, and I, along with my guests, will be covering topics related to drawing good movement – things like self and social awareness, brain science, positive psychology, extending grace, and so much more.
We’ll share tools that can help you understand why you are the way you are, why others are the way they are, and how you can use that to step out of self-told lies with grace and compassion to draw good movement in conversations, relationships, and life in rural America.
Tune in every Tuesday, and make sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode! Let’s go draw good movement!
